Long time no update.

I don't have much playtime these days, but that will change somewhat after finals next week.

We closed on the house & have started on the makeover. I'll share pics soon. We've picked our paint colors, have kick butt hardwoods that need just a little love (30+ years under a carpet will keep 'em pretty). DD wants a black carpet and lavender walls - we can do that. DS wants royal blue & an area rug. Hubster & I are going with cafe a lait and a reddish accent wall.

We're packing and cleaning, all excited and just plain happy. I'm fighting through a flareup from hell. ON Tuesday and Wednesday I repeatedly lost my balance while standing still. Joyous. It's a sign that I need to go back in for another evaluation. Last time I was told that if things didn't improve that surgery was my only option.

Oh f*ckity f*ck f*ck.

The family knows I'm having a flareup, but don't know how bad it is yet. I know I should tell them, but summer is almost over, we're starting a new chapter of our lives, and I don't want to deal with the same questions and odd behavior thrown my way right after my diagnosis. What I really want is them happy until things slow down a bit.

If there was a time for comfort food, it's now. I've been pretty good about that this past week. We had coconut cake and I didn't have more the one slice a day and I didn't have a slice every day. I made a wicked vegetable stew for dinner the other night and wallowed in it's almost fat free, decadent, old school goodness. I followed the recipe from the winter 2007 issue of Don't Eat Off the Sidewalk and added celery and green peas. The dumplings I didn't like much (never have) so I only had the one (about the size of a half dollar coin).

As much as food could be used to comfort me, I won't use it that way. I'm going to be on crutches soon enough at this rate - I don't need to use food as one. Or alcohol. I'm so tempted.

I'm probably going to disappear for a day or two while I complete assignments and get more moving stuff out of the way.

Until next time.

7th day - my day off!

Well, sorta off. I'm not going to actively work out, but I have packing, cleaning, and laundry to do. Strength training and walking. The dumpster is a couple minutes away from our place, so toting multiple bags of trash will work my arms and shoulders. Laundry involves a bit of bending and reaching on top of lifting the baskets. And oh man do we have some baskets to lift!

As for food, I need to go shopping. I have beans on hand and some GimmieLean sausage and homemade taco tvp/nutmeat left over, but just enough for another day or two. I need to grab some protein and veggies.

Monday has always been my weigh in day, so I'm keeping it. Tomorrow I'll post my loss (I don't think I have one) or gain (I hope I don't have one) and reevaluate how I've eaten and what I can do to change things.

One thing I need to do is get rid of my triggers. I've been craving sugar lately and have eaten sweets. but I didn't go over in points. I know the difference between a good choice and a bad one, but lately I've been working overtime to fit a desired food into my day without going over. I'm not beating myself up, but damn! I have learned to cheat without cheating and it always bites me in the butt. It's annoying and frustrating.

When I eat things that don't agree with me I feel ick. I'm bloated, gassy, and miserable. I'm kinda feeling that way right now and had a decent breakfast (Mexican omelet - 2 eggs, taco nut meat, onion, jalapeno, & salsa with water and a cup of coffee) and somewhat naughty snack (small slice coconut cake with water).

Groan....
Whine....
Whimper....

K, done. Time to snap out of it and fix what I'm doing wrong. I know what's wrong and need to stop ignoring it and fix it. I grab certain foods out of habit, not hunger. Until I can get better control when it comes to those foods, I won't bring them home. If the sweet craving hits, a square of dark chocolate or sugar free pudding will be my fix. Or fruit with (coconut) cream or yogurt.

I feel better. And it didn't take a week of moping to do so.

Day six - gloomy and gray out

Yay, the first tropical storm to threaten the US is a mere 100 miles away. I'm not worried about it because I'm too busy stressing about the closing on Thursday. It's just gloomy out at the moment, no rain or wind. The dogs didn't want to stay outside and that bugs me a little. Maybe they know something I don't. Or maybe they hate the neighbors.

Day 6 of 8MM went well. I'm looking forward to the day off, but it won't really be a day off because more cleaning and semi-heavy lifting will be in order. Yep, still packing and cleaning.

Tonight is Anime Night and that usually means a theme dinner. I'm not sure if we'll do Mexican, Greek, Asian, or something else. Breakfast for dinner always appeals to me. I'm just going to go go with the flow.

Day five - it's gonna be a long one

Packing, cleaning, cooking, etc. Gah! Hubby's off today so maybe we can get something done. Maybe.

Here's to a kick butt weekend!

Day four - feeling great!

Got in a 30 minute walk and my 8MM this morning. I can't believe I went walking so early, but it's supposed to be hot today and I have a lot to do. It feels good to be on track with food and exercise.

My brother and sister-in-law called last night to invite me to go with them to a Weight Watchers meeting. Yep, after talking to my bro on and off for a couple of years and trying to get him to go with me, he's joined. She lost 9 pounds and he lost 7. They're excited and both feel that this will last a lifetime. I'm thrilled for them.

The Emmy nominations just aired. Woohoo Michael C. Hall & Dexter! Woohoo Neil Patrick Harris (Doogie)! Woohoo The Office!

Today's plans include classwork, cooking (which I didn't get to do yesterday), cleaning, packing, and torturing the kiddos. We also have a few things Tivo'd to take out before we move, so our weekend entertainment is set. I will happily pack while watching Saw 3.

Almost forgot - another reason to turn on the oven

This mac & cheez from VegNews. I've been playing with different variations of vegan mac & cheez and think I'll give this one a shot. So far my fav has been from the Fat Free Vegan Kitchen with a lightened version of The New Farm's recipe running a close second. Especially when either diced tomatoes or broccoli are tossed in - yummy!

And what did I see when I went to FFVK to grab the link? Blueberry Oat Bars! OMG, I've got to make these! I have everything for them on hand. See, this wahm has been seriously craving sugar - so much that the kids' Nutri-Grain bars are looking good. I've always thought they should have more filling (and a name that truly reflects what they are, bigger fig newtons with non-fig fillings). The blueberry oat bars might just do the trick.

Dang! Hubster has jury duty tomorrow. Pooh!

Wednesday day 3

Whew! It's hot out and inside today. I've been cleaning and packing pretty much since I crawled out of bed this morning. I got in my 8MM and after all this heavy lifting I think I may make tomorrow my day off instead of Sunday. Maybe. I haven't decided yet.

Food has been ok, but I've had to make myself eat because I haven't been hungry. For dinner tonight we're having pasta with a garden vegetable sauce and a zucchini, garlic, tomato, and onion saute on the side. I'm going to water saute them and add a little oil just before serving, either a drizzle of olive or flax oil. I'd planned to make either pumpkin or flax muffins too, but it's too frickin hot! Maybe after the sun sets I'll go for it.

Where does DS get the frickin energy? He's making me tired - biking, two basketball games, and now fooling about with his RC car - all in the three hours. Gah!

I may be back later; undecided.

Tuesday, day two

Got in a 15 minute walk and my 8MM day two! I'm not sure what I'm having for breakfast this morning. I threw together a lunch for hubby and am thinking toward lunch and dinner. I'm getting hungry, so I have to eat something. I'm leaning toward either a smoothie or grits and an egg.

Yep, still struggling with veganism. It would help if I'd remember to grab certain things at the store. Like tofu & TVP. It would help more if Publix carried TVP so I wouldn't have to go to Whole Foods or Earth Fare where I'm tempted to buy a little of everything.

DSS will be here to see his new room and get it the way he wants it! I was kind of worried he'd have to go back to his mom's before we could get it just right, but nope! Yeah!

9 days until closing. OMG!

Man it's been a long Monday!

But I had a Doctor Who marathon on Sci-Fi today to help pass the time while I typed, cleaned, and worked on school projects.

As far as food it wasn't a bad day. I responded to my craving to sweets with a cinnamon roll and was thoroughly disappointed in it. It wasn't as good as I'd hoped it would be. I'm glad I didn't go over in points to have it. I came in at 26 points and 1 activity point - not too shabby, especially since I get 26.

I've decided to follow the old point rules that gave me 26 daily points instead of the 27 under the newer rules. I tried going with 27 for a while and made sure I got in that point most days...and went over more often than not. I love those 35 flex points, and used to allow myself to go over 5 points every day just because I could. I didn't gain anything back while OP (on plan), but I think I could have lost more weight by staying closer to my daily points alone.

This isn't about how I did before. This is about how I'm doing now and will be in the near future. I need to keep that in mind so I don't slip into a negative state.

I'm going to hit the sack in a few. Yep, me. I'm going to bed at a decent hour. Bout time, eh?

Here's to Tuesday!

July 14

I weighed in this morning at 225. Yay! I love starting the week with a loss!

The landscapers showed up a little early, so the dogs will have to wait for a longer walk. They got in a few minutes of running about wildly while I limped nearby.

I got in my 8MM workout (using a resistance band instead of dumbbells) and a few minutes of yoga. I feel so good! I think the band will be a little easier on my shoulder than the dumbbells for rows and presses without changing the effectiveness of the workout. We'll see.

I had cereal for breakfast for the first time in weeks. It was yummy! I used to grab a bowl at night if I felt the need to snack. I should pick the habit back up, especially since it was a whopping 1-2 points for the bowl (1/2 cup Fiber One original + 1/2 cup unsweetened almond milk; another point if I throw in berries).

More later.

The next 4 weeks

...will consist of final exams, a huge IT Networking project, new house stuff (cleaning, painting, ripping up carpet & finishing hardwood floors, reglazing bathroom tiles, work, school stuff for the kiddos, snuggling with hubster, being knocked over by dogs (as usual), and following the routine that helped me when I started on a weigh loss journey a few years back. This will be my typical weekday routine:

• Get hubster off to work
  
• 15-20 minute walk with the dogs (well, hobble for me until my knee is back to 100%)
  
• 8 Minutes in the Morning
• Breakfast and supplements (multi+iron, GLA, CoQ10, joint formula, flaxseed oil, magnesium + calcium, something for pain if needed)
  
• School & work
• Family stuff - lunch with the kids, torturing them with my 'uncoolness,' dinner with my three favorite people
  
• Afternoon or evening walk or yoga; meditation

On weekends I'll get to skip the am dog walking cause hubster & the kids take over, and I may not have work, but everything else stays the same.

Program and personal goals

• Start 7/14
• 6-8 pounds down by 8/10 (218-220 the goal weight)
• 190 by 12/31

Overall goals

• 150 pounds
• 45 minute to 1 hour karate or kickboxing class (or video) at least twice a week

I will look at myself the way hubby sees me.

When this 4 weeks is over, I'll start a new cycle. I can eat what I want; nothing's forbidden. I will play with my food as always, but will try new things more often. I'll weigh in weekly, but will stay away from the tape measure for at least 2 weeks.

Change of plans, sigh

Turbo Jam will have to sit a little longer because my knee and hip are not having it. It doesn't usually cause problems with my hip, but since me knee is swollen, screaming, and kind of crooked (damn dogs), I have to go low impact.

A buddy of mine is also on a journey toward better health and recently discovered 8 Minutes in the Morning. I have the book and followed the routine while walking up to an hour a day or popping in an exercise video. I was losing inches, gaining strength, and looking hot. I was following a low fat eating plan (not the one in the book but similar) and was feeling great. I only stopped following that routine because of my accident. I dropped EVERYTHING after the accident.

Hubby pulled out the book and restarted a couple of months ago and supplemented the routine with time on the elliptical. Lucky thing hasn't changed his eating habits and is losing weight and inches. (Sometimes men just SUCK!) It's hard to be completely supportive when his progress makes me a little jealous. I love that man and am proud of him, no questions, no doubts. But damn! There are weeks that I'm on target 110% and lose a pound while he loses 3. Grrrr!

Speaking of, have you seen those Slimquick commercials? The woman struggles with her loss while her guy loses effortlessly. They're cute ads but hit too close to home for me to laugh at. Smile, yes, but not laugh out loud.

Speaking of laughing out loud, it's really late and I'm going to get a fix of my new guilty pleasure, dumb criminal shows. Most Shocking is on and this episode covers stupid naked criminals. Then I'm going to fall asleep (hopefully) and have a good Friday.

Hope you have a good one, too.

Sigh, Tuesday

Turbo Jam was fun this morning, but I'm paying for it. I think I'll need to adjust my workout schedule thanks to my knee and no thanks to the dogs. I so want to be angry, but Fred is giving me the 'I love you, momma' face and curled up under the desk, resting her feet on my feet. Awww. Demon!

I'm not eating my annoyance away, which is a good thing. But I am slacking off with my assignment, so I need to end this shortly.

The appraisal is today. I'm kind of stressing about it, but it's out of my hands. And it being out of my hands will help me keep junk food out of my hands and mouth.

It's official - I think I hate my dogs

Not all the time, just today. Well, any day that they decide to knock me down by slamming into my knees. And following up by jumping on me in their attempts to get each other. I'm sitting here with throbbing pain bouncing up and down my left side (already my weak side), listening to their tags jingle as they wrestle less than three feet away; oblivious.

At least I got in a little of the morning walk before I ate wet grass, eh?

My knee is wrapped at the moment and hopefully will be good enough tomorrow for walking. Instead of Turbo Jam I'll dust off Walk Away the Pounds. Today I'll get in some upper body work and eat well.

I've decided to start counting WW points again. I'm not changing how I eat, just making sure I keep my portions in check. And I'm cutting the caffeine down again. I've been bad and getting way too much of it lately.

Monday, Monday.....

Here's how my week went

It's been stressful, but not bad overall. I exercised, ate ok, and made it through two potential binges. I won't bore you with too many details.

I bought a pedometer and logged my walks and elliptical strides.:
Monday - 8,000 steps
Tuesday - 3500 so far (stupid pedometer reset during my morning walk)
Wednesday - 3672 steps
Thursday - 2200 steps (not a good day at all)
Friday - 4200 so far

21,572 for the week! Not too shabby!

I also made it through the week without Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dumb knocking me off my feet during their morning walk/run. They did, however, destroy dog bed #4, a pair of sunglasses, and a battery for one of s-son's RC cars. Lovely, eh?

I've been a slacker about getting in a sweat-inducing workout lately. I have Turbo Jam just sitting here, so I've decided that I'll follow the schedule for a month to see how what progress I make. I really liked the workout. I just feel strange about working out with an audience. Silly, isn't it? I like how it feels, but blow it off in case I hear giggles or a snide comment. It's all in my head. My kids like when I exercise and have joined me. The last ones to giggle were hubby and my brother when I pulled out one Richard Simmons' Broadway videos. And they quickly shut up once they saw that it was work - I challenged the slackers and they left me alone after 5 minutes, lol. I need to shut those bad inner voices out and get back to work. Feel free to give me a shove if I slack off.

Have a wonderful weekend! Get your grill on - lots of healthy alternatives out there that taste just as good!

Thoughts on my progress so far

So I weighed in at 226 on Monday. I started on March 7 at 238 and a few inches bigger. Here are my stats for the past few months:

5/1 measurements:
neck- 15 (down 1 since 3/19)
chest- 48 (same)
arms- (L) 13 1/4 (R) 14 (down 1/2)
waist- 43 1/2 (down 2 1/2 )
hips- 42 (down 2)
thighs- (L) 23 1/3 (R) 23 1/2 (actually a little bigger)

6/2 measurements:
neck 15 (same)
chest= 47 1/2 (1/2" down)
Arm = 13 1/2 R, 13 1/4 L (down 1/2")
Calf = 16 3/4 R, 16 3/4 L
thigh = 22 3/4 L, R = 23 (down 3/4")
hips 42 1/4 (up 1/4 & my butt is higher)
waist 42 (down 1 1/2")

7/1 measurements:
neck - 15" (same as last month)
chest - 47 1/2" (same)
arms - 13 1/2 " R, 13 1/4" L (same)
calves - 16 1/2 " R , 16 1/2 L (down 1/4)
thighs - 23" R, 22 3/4 L (same)
hips - 42 1/4 (same, butt even higher & rounder)
waist - 41 3/4" (down 1/4")

Another 1/2" down overall! Progress is progress!

There are those who will say that I'm unmotivated and should get moving more, and I'm one of them. But I know my body and know what happens when I push too hard. It's taken a lot for me to break free of my "all or nothing" mindset and desire to always eat the bad feelings away. I've challenged myself to keep exercising, no matter what the form, to find better ways of working through my feelings, and to not beat myself up if I don't have the same results as someone else. It's not about just getting smaller, it's about getting and keeping a healthier mind, body, and spirit.

Overall I feel a lot better. More confident, sexier, happier, and healthier. I have bad days, but when I do I don't beat myself up. I'm motivated, but tend to let myself become distracted. Right now school (midterms) and the home buying process are the distractions. The family wants me to get healthier and encourage me to hit the elliptical or grab the weights. I went biking with my stepson and he loved every second of leaving me in the dust. When he did, that is. I held my own, lol; can't get beat by a 10 year old, lol.

I know that I am more than the numbers on the scale and the size of my clothes. The inner sexy hottie mama is coming out more often and I'm loving it!

To my Pound Losin Pretty Chicks, Skinny bitches, and those losing 50-100, ya'll rock! Thanks for the motivation & support!

Monday and Tuesday so far

Monday June 30 -
I'm at 226 - gained back two that I lost at the beginning of June. Ick. I feel fat and bloated. I need to get back on track and stay there!

I hurt today. I didn't sleep well over the weekend and am having a little flare-up. Woohoo! Fatigue + pain always makes me want to eat for comfort, meaning starchier stuff. And I fed that craving but kept the fat content down. A little victory is better than none.

8000 steps (I forgot to put it on while running errands)
30 minute walk

Tuesday July 1 -
Summer is already half over. Wow.
My stupid pedometer reset during my morning walk! Grrr!

B: 3 cups fruit salad (strawberries, blueberries, & pineapple), coffee, water, & supplements

L: Homemade vegan sausage on bun w/jalapeno hot sauce, pickle, cucumbers; water

Snack: coffee, water, & Oreo cookies

D (planned): big ol' salad - romaine, cukes, grape tomatoes, celery, onions, & Morningstar Farms chik'n strips (vegan) w/Annie's Goddess dressing or Green Goddess dressing; lemonade or iced tea

3500 steps
45 minutes walking
15 minutes elliptical